The trouble with life is there's no background music. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead! I shouldn't tell you this one cuz I'm female..I still think its funny. Please standby..next intelligent word out of my mouth may be coming out shortly.12. The trouble with political jokes is they usually get elected. Women are like phones - -they love to be held and talked to, but if you push the wrong button - - -you're CUT OFF !
You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me. I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on. They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken...Keep em coming....... Due to high overhead costs,the light at the end of the tunnel has been permanently turned off. If something doesn't feel right, you're not feeling the right thing.
Treat each day as your last; one day you will be right. Isn't it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"? You have the capacity to learn from your mistakes, and you will learn a lot today. I want to go to IKEA, hide in a wardrobe, wait for someone to open it and yell "WELCOME TO NARNIA".
[Arabic saying] Which one of these is the non-smoking lifeboat? The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial. I think sex is better than logic, but I can't prove it. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
My first instinct was perhaps a little weird, but I'm glad I followed it.
Once my friend took my advice, she started getting way more messages. Here's the secret: Mention that you're a champion at Connect Four. After my friend included the tidbit about being awesome at Connect Four, she's gotten tons of messages from guys who jokingly insist they can beat her at the nostalgia-inducing game. It'll kick a guy's competitive drive into high gear, and he'll know you're playful—a big source of attraction.
It’s insanely difficult to be funny, engaging, interesting, etc., in an opening line with a girl you know nearly nothing about."You have to help me create my Hinge profile," my friend said via Gchat.She was at a complete loss as to what to say but still determined to come up with something good, knowing that a witty bio can command just as much attention as a pretty face.In the world of dating apps/websites, there’s so much competition out there for cute girls, your opening line can make or break whether she will engage.How many times have you gotten matched with a PYT, but when you message her, she doesn’t respond?All I ask for in terms of payment is that if one of my openers helps you land a girl, you think of me when you hook up with her (but not, like, in a gay way or anything, be cool).